Social media - participate or disappear

In Mallorca in June

I had a bit of a Facebook débâcle the other day.  Realising that my profile was somewhat incomplete, I added some further details - notably that I was in a civil partnership with Paul.  Now this event occurred in France (so it was a PACS, which is treated as a CP in the UK) almost six years ago.  I thought I was simply clarifying the record.  Little did I realise that it came across to the world as if we had just entered into a civil partnership here in the UK.  The result was not only a deluge of "likes" and messages of congratulation but furious phonecalls from Paul's sisters asking why they hadn't been informed.  

This taught me two things immediately.  First, I'm incompetent on Facebook.  Secondly, though, that masses of the people we know actually follow people on it.  As a result, if you don't participate at all you run the risk of disappearing.

This road to Damascus experience came at just the right moment.  I've been a little obsessed in recent months with my poetic efforts, and have as a result tended to retire into my little shell.  I should know at this advanced stage of life that I can become obsessive and that it's almost invariably a Bad Thing.  

In fact it's been a wonderful summer down here in Hastings - and although I've chosen a picture (not actually a selfie in the proper sense) from our holiday in Mallorca earlier this year, the sunny background could easily, with slight adjustment - insertion of fishing huts and shingle beach and fish and chip shops - be Hastings.  The poetry obsession got its grip with a week's summer school on campus at Lancaster University in July, and I then spent my time entering one competition after another - without winning even an honourable mention in any of them.  So a bit of retreating and regrouping has taken place, with the realisation that I personally don't write better through obsessing about it, because the writing becomes overly self-conscious.  Alas, that Nobel Prize is never going to land in my lap.  But I've got so much else to be thankful for and happy about that I can live with that degree of failure.

Also, I realised that I needed to get back to blogging, which is good fun.  I shall even have to improve my Facebook expertise.  And who knows, by being a little more in touch with everyone I might even improve on the poetry front.

Antony Mair